It's all about Blair and Chuck. I have always said this but now it really is true. What an episode! What a show stopper! Not to mention that the homeless woman Dan's been hanging out with was out of town – What a relief! This episode was the real Gossip Girl drama I first fell for, so many seasons ago. But before we get to the tearjerker couple, let's recap the supporting cast, shall we?First and foremost, Dorota and Vanya got married! But it wasn't just any wedding. It was a traditional Polish wedding given by none other then pastel suited Chuck Bass – more about that later. The wedding was perfect and beautiful, traditional and simple, except for frail tear soaked Blair – more about that later. But nevertheless Dorota and Vanya got married, kissed, and the party ensued!
At the party, Jenny continued to step on Serena's heels and Nate continued to think she was just being sweet, sisterly Jenny. Silly Nate, you should know by now that Upper East Side women always have a hidden agenda. And just as Jenny got the courage to make her move again, Serena left the party, how convenient. But she left with Carter, eww. He's looking extra slimy and extra extra eye twitchy right now. See Carter is back in town and he's busy wrapping Serena around his greasy finger all under the guise of finding her dearest daddy. And it took Serena forever to catch on but once she did she made like a big girl and kicked him out of the limo and onto the curb in the middle of Queens. Good news for Nate but he won't get this message seeing as Little J is screening his calls. Damn cell phone, can't ever keep track of that little ringing gadget! So on Serena went, to see her dad, I mean, her mom? Wait, mom? Mom, why the hell are you in my dad's Palm Beach hotel room!? I guess the slutty apple doesn't fall far from the slutty tree.
Meanwhile, Rufus finally tries to contact his wife after how many weeks now and realizes that she's not where she said she would be. Did this not already happen this season? Anyway, it won't be long until he finds out what Serena knows and then the slutty shit will hit the fan. Oh, and there was a funny Rufus moment when he was on the phone with the hotel reservationist reciting all of the possible names Lily may have booked her stay under: Lily Humpfrey, Lily Bass, Lily van der Woodsen, Lily Rhodes... Ha!
Also at the party was that skinny gay boy that Jenny met at sewing camp a few years back. You'd think that the way everyone ignores him he's take the hint but he just won't go away! So yeah, he was there and his crush came to the party to surprise him but he brought his girlfriend. Major bummer. But then he dumped his girlfriend and admitted to being bi, which by the way doesn't exist for men over the age of seventeen so that girlfriend was most likely his last. So good news for Tagalong!
And now to the main event: Blair and Chuck. Oh Blair and Chuck! Is it really over? It can’t be! See Chuck set up the whole Polish extravaganza to win back Blair. He bought her a Cartier necklace; he begged for her forgiveness. But Blair wasn’t having it – she's still too distraught over what he’d done to her and what she’d been willing to do for him. Oh the ugly places love takes you! The murky mood changed for the worse when Blair finally did give in to Chuck but only on the grounds that they are both horrid scum and that they deserve each other’s awful company while they burn in hell together. Yes, gossip Girl really did get this dark. Chuck rebuffed her of course, his ego wounded, and Blair cried black tears at the joyous wedding. The most gut wrenching part was watching Chuck’s face as he watched Blair come apart – that Ed Westwick has really got the tormented despair thing down! It all ended when Chuck pleaded, “Blair, don't bail on me. We have to see this through to the end,” and her reply, “This is the end, Chuck.” Ugh! I can’t!
And just like that, Blair was doing shots with Dan and Chuck was taking some Brighton Beach floozy back to his penthouse.
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